I wish my brain has a map, to tell me where my heart should go.

I am staring, at the moon. At the balcony.

There were so many instances in my life, where a situation so similar as this, came into being. I got over all, with ease, now that I look back at my life.
Things weren't so simple.

At times, I stopped to wonder. Was this how they felt when I treated them this way? It is like tasting my own evil medicine, this black taint of evil. Of emotional attachment.

Buddhism teaches us to rid ourselves of all human attachments, to bring joy and happiness to all with our compassion and loving kindness. May this be the last hurdle that I have to jump over. Whether if I succeed or not, I seriously do not know.

All I know is, people have been telling me as long as the one you love is happy, it is all that matters. Sometimes, I do feel that way. But when I'm alone, I tend to think and no, my mind doesn't go that way. I've been making empty promises to myself that I will change. Change for the better, to brighten up my future endeavors.

Many times I cried at my own failures. As a man, I should not cry. But I still did. I am a wuss. I should stand up and tell this world, "FUCK YOU. I AM STRONG AND I WILL TIDE OVER THIS."

For now, I am numb and neutral. But I know, there will be times when I reminisce and think of the happy times, I will break down. How things were different before but no. I should not harp on the past and look towards the future. After all, this is not the end. My end is not here, it is somewhere else. I tell myself, I've been a dork all these while and I will strive, to achieve.

I will strive.
This is Pearson, this is my blog and this is my life.
I am by the surname of Wu and I will make a difference within myself.
I must change. I must and I will.
Fall, I must not. Stand, I will.