Monday, December 27, 2010

Please Rain

X'mas is over. It felt so long. It was a long weekend, honestly.
I got my first nerf! its an alpha trooper! not like I really care about the technical terms of the toy but, finally! I was actually waiting for a value buy. Initially, I wanted to get a Recon just like the others but after looking at its performance, I got turned off.

As for the other later models, not worth the buy too. $$ and performance. Till this little guy came and I was like, O.K! time to get one myself. And yep, I am very satisfied with my purchase.

On to X'mas shopping, one word to describe it. Great! Never shopped this much before getting things that I actually want. Got 2 pairs of spec frames for both gf and me. Sweet. Couple wear.

shoes, clothes and thats all. Happy with the day being spent.

Back to work.

Friday, December 24, 2010

Its X'mas!

Let me just give a quick post before my girlfriend finds out that I've been skiving when I told her I was busy.

Its nearing X'mas and X'mas eve is today! How shall I put this. 2010 had been a year packed with many shit and good stuffs. I'll just briefly summarize, first quarter of the year was hell. Total black. 
After June, things got a little brighter and as of now, I'm pretty content with my life. 
Anyway, I'm still discontented with somethings. Perhaps it isn't wise to list it out for the public to see, considering I've learnt a very harsh lesson. I shall just be quiet and slowly fade away.
What is it that demands so much of my attention? I don't think I should. I have other things to worry about and focus on. 

This isn't my passion, this isn't part of my circle. But it was where I got to know great people. Big or small. They have made an impact on my life. Still, I don't have the will to commit anymore. 
Wait, since when have I from the beginning? I'm only capable of standing by the sidelines and watch. Maybe give a few kicks and pushes and verbal supports. That is all.

Either way, I'll just sit back, watch and do nothing.
On that black note, I wish everyone a Merry X'mas and a happy new year.


Friday, October 22, 2010

Totally didnt had time to blog at all. It seems only possible when I'm really really bored with nothing to do. Anyway, the haze is back everyone. Reminds me of my primary school days. Just that, it's totally different this time. Driving with he skies so gloomy, it almost gave me the impression that I'm driving thru Racoon City of Resident Evil's fame.

I kind of like the gloomy atmosphere though. It gets gloomy enough when there're rain clouds.

And i got attacked by <3's cat. B was trying to carry it away from the back of my car and the cat somehow lost balanced the grabbed on to me, sinking it's left claws into my left shoulder. It REALLY went in. And I was trying to pull it away and couldnt, that was when I realized, the cat had grappled itself onto the flesh of my left shoulder.

Finally pulled it out and I sucked out some blood. Hopefully that'll rid some of the infection that would occur.

Ok I'm hungry.

Monday, September 27, 2010

eh can hurry up...the sun getting bigger leh...

brushing off the dust from my blog, I realised blogging for me is a pretty much on and off thing.
I don't own an iphone (and I don't intend to get one since I kind of hate apple products now).

What I need is better time management for myself and hell, get rid of all ERP gantries if possible.
 I think this world needs more love and much stricter discipline.
Self control is not possible for every individual but have a heart to think.
Don't be the cause of another's suffering just for your moment of pleasure. If you made a mistake, be sure to change.


Ok, enough "wise" crap. I need to sleep soon. long day ahead for me tomorrow.
argh.


<3 anj!

Monday, September 20, 2010

a side glace into the mirror

am I disappointing those who had expectations?

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

it came true.

Honestly, I don't feel the drive anymore. why.





you'll always be in our heart, pena. 9/9/10

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

ORD


I wonder if i was truly happy during the course of my 2 year service. Much of it was filled with foolish misery brought upon by myself and too many mistakes were made.
Well...take it as a learning experience. Having power over civilians was not easy. You will have the urge to abuse it at every opportunity (which by RIGHT you don't need to). Some will disagree with you and think it would be perfectly normal and to identify yourself as an officer of the law.
I see that as the reason why they're not the ones with the blue uniforms. You need to see if the situation doesn't put you in an awkward situation. We don't just jump in and everything will go your way. Its not always like in the soap operas or shows.

That aside, ORD. One more duty shift. I was feeling half melancholic but now, i prefer to be napping on my comfy bed.

Its nearing the end of my night shift and i wish my girlfriend is sleeping soundly and comfortably. <3

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Shit happens.


The phone that kept me occupied, a tool for communication and since 2 months back, my mobile internet surfer.
At duty now. 7 more days! Freedom!

I'm missing you. Get well soon pls you silly <3

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Know your limits, young man.


You're still living in your teenage days. The kind society ignore, or laugh at how young you are. Don't taint the colour of the brotherhood. You're a disgrace for doing what you are attempting to do right now. I have my resources. Watch your step.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Rating to be advised.


I have a very sexy and adorable girlfriend. Whee.
Currently on duty and i can't sleep. My throat is getting urgh.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

I really need a normal day with proper sleeping time. Just once.


Away from gigging life, apart from honing my drumming and all the shit that had caused the unhappiness in the ridiculously sensitive me, i really do hope to get a very normal day in which i'll get to spend with my family and <3 . I want sometime to ourselves, cultivate the bond and break the misunderstandings that ever took place.
I thought it was the ultimate setback, one which i would never recover. Turns out i was wrong. Thanks for sticking with me throughout my emotional crisis and listening to my shit almost everyday.

Your letter brought me smiles. I love you, sweet (:

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Hor fun isn't fun at all


How long have i left this space untouched? I guess i was either too busy or too lazy to do an update. When i had the spare time, it would most likely be spent with my sweet girl.

Quite a bit had happened these past few days and <3 was always there to calm me down. My personality is somehow changing and changing. Well i hope its for the better.

And neo's birthday barbecue was a success!

I don't know if you've been keeping tabs on my blog since i haven't been updating for so long. <3 you!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

i need more posters on my wall

its amazing isn't it. we just happen to have everything alike. down to preferences.
it is just a day away but like you mentioned, it doesn't really matter. <3


hell, one isn't enough. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 


ok, imma go prepare for work now.

Friday, July 30, 2010

Really really need to


Ok, i cannot tahan liao. Miss my girl D:

Neck of an owl, eyes of an eagle.


Nope, i'm not looking back. Time to kickstart my engines. Moving forward, not backwards.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Take the day off if you're really sick ffs.


This space has been neglected again. It has been long since i've really fallen sick. And it sucks. There were so many things i wanted to do but oh well.
<3's been showing me pretty much attention when i'm down. Don't worry about not being by my side! I'll be fine :D your comforting words and humour through the phone is enough to make me feel much much better while i'm physically weak. Love you!

Ok like i've told a few, singapore is inhabited by really really selfish and self centered citizens. Being selfish is bad enough already, but to complain and whine over the smallest issues. Geez. I'm whining here so, LOL. want an example of singapore's ugly side? Take public transport. You'll see why.

Monday, July 26, 2010

A small nudge and off it goes.

Whoever is going to talk to me, tread carefully. I'm getting easily annoyed till I don't know when.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Happy birthday mom!

Happy birthday to my dearest mom. thanks for taking care of me all these years of me growing up. I love you and dad (:

Monday, July 19, 2010

It doesn't change anything, at all.


I think the most important point I wanted to put across was, acceptance. Simple as it is.

Anyway, my temper hasn't been good these days. Don't ask me why. I can only be gentle and calm at duty but away from it, I lose my cool easily. Before, I thought it was suppose to be the other way round. Now, vice versa. Pretty swell and stupid at the same time.

Well, not like I really care much anyway.

Times spent with you were blissful. I love you (:

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Sleep tight <3


We can't please everyone. Thats how i'm going to leave it. As it is. This is us, this is me. Stop pushing your own assumptions on to others. Stop trying to be a smart ass. If you are indeed smart, you wouldn't be where you are now. I am not particularly upset over the incident but neither am I going to stand by and be a mute. If you are reading this, stop it. You have my thanks before I start flaring up.

Monday, July 12, 2010

more songs to practice again...

annoying piece of shit.


played nerf at sbm today, woo. good game, but i got fragged easily ~.~ owell. baby came over to accompany though. heh thanks!


alright, i guess i should be sleeping early these days. late nights had been affecting my health.


nights everyone!

Thursday, July 8, 2010

APPLES


You brighten my days (:

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

How many more days to go?


I hate found a new challenge in life. That is, to tahan smart alecks making others work life miserable. Not that it is much of my problem since i'm the one relaxing here. Anyway, pineapple came over to the temple yesterday and stayed awhile for the jamming. Thanks for taking the time to come all the way here! Ok, back to work.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

When your fridays never came


I am tired but i couldn't care less. It was enjoyable. My life. Weekends were the days i look forward to.before. Now, i look forward to days of peace.

Shine Mascot Parade 2010


OK so the bottom snare skin broke and I was blamed for it. What? For hitting on it too loud? Ridiculous! Drums are suppose to withstand the whacks and strokes of a drummer!
Only when you REALLY intend to break the snare and use a full swing of your sticks, THEN the snare will break. Still, I was blamed for it. Bad timing. Well, forget it.

Because of the delay in getting a replacement for the snare, our song list was cut down to only 2 songs after the 1st song. Bummer. BUT, I would say the whole event was a success. Besides, screw ups are meant to happen from time to time. I enjoyed the process of going up there, doing my best and going back down the stage, taking photos and supporting the other bands performing. We all did a great job!

More to come, I need to rest. seriously. haha
and...thank you for coming! (:

Friday, July 2, 2010

boiling...boiling...exploded

Hectic days. Hope saturday turns out well!


It was nice, to have someone I can talk to. 
Hope it lasts.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Weekdays...

I figured since i'm free, i might as well do up a lil bit of an update. Mobile surfing had never been this convenient. It is going to a long day.

Pui

I crave for century eggs. I crave for mee goreng. I crave for kok kee wan ton mee. I crave for pocky. I crave for many foods.

this is so ghey. I crave for so many ghey stuffs.
Sleepless nights again. Yawn. Munching on cabbages.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

An offer of a piece of tissue can mean a lot to me.

Saturday's gig was by far, my best performance yet. I had so much fun drumming out all the stress and depressions I had in me that I sweated till I looked as thought I just came out of shower.

Still, I give it a wait and see attitude. Grandma's birthday celeb later. I was thinking of going for a jog but seeing the weather, lol.

July 3rd! @ SCAPE!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

weekday veg!

Back from Camp LIONS, got to know alot of great people. Shagged but the effort paid off. Thanks everyone for the hardwork!

I just got home from work and mom was making coffee. Sweet, there is still half a kettle of hot water left so I'll go make myself a cereal drink and a bowl of instant noodles...before I take my nap.
duty officer for the night was effed up as usual. zzz

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

nemez guidaz

Dropping the tool hammer once my responsibilities are over. Decision made.

Souless collectors

Have some balls to admit please. It takes two hands to clap. See? I'm not saying that I was entirely innocent. And there were many things you assumed.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

StreetFestival '10


StreetFest' 10 is over. 7 months of blood and sweat. It was an eye opener for, an exposure, to awaken myself that I still have lots to learn. Kudos to all the other performers! You all did well. 

To my band, I had fun playing music with you guys. There will be more to come yeah?
Now, I feel I deserve some peace after all the stress and unfortunate events that took place for the past 7 months.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Laughable Insanity.

I need drinking session, big time.

Ground zero.

I'm sick, stressed and feeling pressured. gg.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

friends that put a smile on your face for the past 3 years

♥ flora ♥ ('.') says:
*LOL
*PEARIE
*HIHI
*(L)
pearson. says:
*YES FLORIE?
*FEELING BETTER?
*U NO REPLY
♥ flora ♥ ('.') says:
*HAHA
*SORRY
*WAS WAITING FOR YOU TO COME ONLINE
*I had telepathic signs
*That you would come online ;)
*Lol!
pearson. says:
*HAHA WHAT BULLSHIT
*LOL IM GOING TO BLOG THIS



yeah right flory LOL

the mirror doesn't tell my anything but it reflects.

very blur now. i'm half alive and everyone around me seems to be getting sick.
flu, headache and sore throat. i can't even down a decent meal without feeling a lil sore in the throat...but at least i got food to eat so thats 10 times better.

work was a bore as usual. the cold weather only made me feel more sleepier...not that i'm complaining because at least i didn't have to sweat the whole afternoon.
still got a bunch of things to get this month. bummer.

back to practicing.

rainbow glasses

人在哪里?

Monday, June 7, 2010

the positive side

awkwardness.
feels like leaving after my jobs done.

Munchkings.

continue to be deluded. The best I can do is laugh in the shadows.

Seems like everyone was tired after yesterday's games trial. I arrived late because even before the games trial began, I was already exhausted. Overslept. Its a bad habit.

Back to munching.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

did he die? -failblog


so yesterday was the day I let go of all the stress I had in me and whatever remaining bullshit that lingered on and sang. I'm not much of a singer. I sing horribly. You wouldn't want to be there. 
I wasn't feeling very well in the morning but after eating the meds given by the doc, felt much better. 
Evening time, went to K Box. If there wasn't a promo rate, I wouldn't have gone. The company I had there...its been a long time since I ever had that sort of  feeling.
Thanks people!

Monday, May 31, 2010

unscrew them, then screw them back

you know what, fuck this shit. I can't be bothered anymore.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Holy Smites.

I'm waiting.

Urgh. I'm deciding whether if I should burn all those things away.
But it'll be air pollution so...hmm.

ok time to go.

Monday, May 24, 2010

monday blues

Took a day off on saturday, for the photoshoot. It was great, just that I wasn't photogenic for my part. haha!

Off to work in an hour or so. My bed summoned me but I decided to keep away from it, too many things on my mind.
That should be the least of my concerns. Plan plan plan. 

Btw, I know some of you are telling me that my posts are very vague and you don't get it.
That was, my intention.

Plan plan plan.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

late night conversations

Overslept. Was supposed to be off in the morning for recee. Yawn.
I'm leave the house soon anyway. Yesterday's practice was cui. For my part.
I left the house with a very uneasy feeling, that I've left something behind.
It was only when I got onto the bus that I realised, I LEFT MY DRUM BAG BEHIND.
Oh well. Had to go to the studio and borrowed a pair of old drumsticks that my hands were totally unfamiliar with.
The weight, to be precise. Dynamics cui. End up feeling cui. ):

k I gotta go prepare now.
Sochii got me a shirt souvenir 8D
likes the shirt.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Need a new pair of sticks again~

I had a beautiful dream while I took my nap in the afternoon.
It only strengthened my resolve.
I shall see this as an opportunity.

After I woke up, I was extremely disappointed. I was like, man. That was just a dream? Now, I wish I never woke up at all.

Almost lost track of myself for awhile there. Gotta get a grip.
Streetfest!

Monday, May 17, 2010

nyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Davin's pawing moments. hahahaha.

anyway, fully packed for today. I won't be home most of the time.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Tooth picks in the eyes.

must...stay awake...to..wake..you...up...

Friday, May 14, 2010

you know what, screw this


I finally had a good rest. For once.
I still have many things to do. Loads of them. I may seem to be free all the time but, it is a big No.
Why do you have to be so young and naive.. I didn't lie to you. I was being lied to instead by a naive mind that doesn't understand the term love and used it freely.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

retrying



I slacked the previous night away with kevin at Pkway parade since we were practically bored and we could just head off to work the next morning. Talked a lot of bull and senseless stuffs.

Headed off to work then. I was half a wreck before I downed a can of red bull.
Beautiful day actually. Heading out soon!
haha and you enjoy your day at www! 8D

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

you made me smile again

Had swimming, sauna and dinner session with Yihan just now. Feel better bro, always look forward. After that, had a very loooooooooooooooooong phone conversation. Its always nice chatting with you (:

O.K, time to finish up my bowl of curry chickens and potatoes.

StreetFest, I am ready for you.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

We got in!

First of all, grats guys. Luck got us in.

Secondly, performance at Vesak Orchard was awesome. Everyone did a great job.

And I am a fan of Black Forest. Honestly speaking, that was the first time I saw them perform. Now I know the reason why.

Been pretty uptight and busy these few days.
Hope to see you more often! (:

Ok, bye for now.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Ruki, Kai, Uruha, Aoi and Reita

O.K so today turned out to be quite alright.
I am back on track. I've changed my wheels, mod-ed my engines, fixed the gears and zeng-ed my mind. The mind controls everything so I'll condition myself for the time being.

Life's like that. Bo bian.

Ich freue mich, dass versprochene Tag.

私は、多くの人が日本語を私はその言語でブログが決定あるので理解するとは思わない。私はまだあなたを愛して。これは痛みが私の心を他の男とが、あなたを見て、あなたは幸せです、それは十分にする必要があります。
それが発生する場合はすべての私が今まで今したいことは私に話をする...簡単なハイテクを、どのようにやっている求めている...私は非常に幸せになる。私はあなたの安全と幸福を毎日のために祈ると私は、今後を見てほしい。




I laughed when I translate everything back to english. It is totally OFF. 
Being stubborn is...annoying.
I want to see it, I want to see what is ahead, with you (: 



Cassis



never gets old 8D

I broke my bottle

Sometimes, figurines come alive.
Our lyrics dancing around, Dreams come true.

The promised day (:

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Inferior~

I am on an insanity streak!
What else more can I ask for.

So today didn't turn out to be the day I expected to be but went window shopping with Kevin for awhile. Went home after that. Had imouto to give me a wake up call at 4 but end up I overslept till 5+.

Its become a norm now. I am growing numb.
Embracing the feeling, while I can.
Cheers all!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Brushing my teeth as I move along

Leaving the house soon.

its movie time!

you were the one who taught me how to smile <3

A closure to this, a closure to everything.

the monochrome scenery in the dead of night



the richly colored extension that I asked for






the more they’re spread out, the more colors are added like a peacock’s feathers


dazzling blinding the magic of light toward the endless spiral (to be continued...)

It is time I moved on.


Teri said something that struck me to the very core. Change for my own self.
The future is unpredictable no matter how we tell ourselves that it is expected or it won't be happening.

For now, I look forward to every day after. There will always be a better tomorrow, no point in crying over spilt milk and regret only at the point of destruction. What is most important, is now.

For this end of the post, I conclude the closure of the 20 years of my life, 20 years of existence on this realm, all the happiness, all the good memories and the unhappiness which would be an experience and lesson for me.

Goodbye Pearson and hello to Xeno.





Saturday, May 1, 2010

the small light of hope.

Dang I overslept. Gotta move.

No time for regrets

It is time to do a change.
What else more can I ask for.

Before loving another, one must first love yourself.

Dam i suck.
its 4.42am and I'm still awake. And I need to be out of the house by 11.30am.
this has been going on for about a week...its a miracle I haven't fall sick yet.

Gotta pull through.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Palms out-stretched

I won't consider the past few days to be norm. Or even for the past 2 months as well. Much happenings and much shit has gone past me. This time, this time. It is either me, myself or none at all.

Quotes from people all around me, I used to ignore them and view them as merely a bunch of words stringed together. However, those quotes may fit certain events that took place for both 2009 and this year, 2010.

For me to know, no one else to know. I need to sit down and relax, think. What have I missed out. What did I do. I need a boost. I cannot stop here.  I must go on. But what drives me?

I'm still searching, for that fill. For now, I rest my case. This is not the end, yet.

We have ten fingers and two hands. A mind to control everything.
We have 24 hours a day only. We can't have 25 hours or more for a day.

But,
we have all the time till our place in this realm expires.

Do we have enough time to accomplish what we've set out to do? Maybe not.
Do we have time to accomplish what we've set out to do with our best efforts? Of course.

Yet to see but knowing you to be in the arms of another man, knowing that you're being comforted by another man. Knowing that you are loving another and being loved. As long as you are happy, I am fine with it. My emotions, I will contain it. May you be blessed and last long with him. <3

My heart is still beating.

anatomy of living

This isn't a good year. Nope, it isn't.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

I wish my brain has a map, to tell me where my heart should go.

I am staring, at the moon. At the balcony.

There were so many instances in my life, where a situation so similar as this, came into being. I got over all, with ease, now that I look back at my life.
Things weren't so simple.

At times, I stopped to wonder. Was this how they felt when I treated them this way? It is like tasting my own evil medicine, this black taint of evil. Of emotional attachment.

Buddhism teaches us to rid ourselves of all human attachments, to bring joy and happiness to all with our compassion and loving kindness. May this be the last hurdle that I have to jump over. Whether if I succeed or not, I seriously do not know.

All I know is, people have been telling me as long as the one you love is happy, it is all that matters. Sometimes, I do feel that way. But when I'm alone, I tend to think and no, my mind doesn't go that way. I've been making empty promises to myself that I will change. Change for the better, to brighten up my future endeavors.

Many times I cried at my own failures. As a man, I should not cry. But I still did. I am a wuss. I should stand up and tell this world, "FUCK YOU. I AM STRONG AND I WILL TIDE OVER THIS."

For now, I am numb and neutral. But I know, there will be times when I reminisce and think of the happy times, I will break down. How things were different before but no. I should not harp on the past and look towards the future. After all, this is not the end. My end is not here, it is somewhere else. I tell myself, I've been a dork all these while and I will strive, to achieve.

I will strive.
This is Pearson, this is my blog and this is my life.
I am by the surname of Wu and I will make a difference within myself.
I must change. I must and I will.
Fall, I must not. Stand, I will.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

I can't stop laughing at this issue with a tissue.

On a side note, am I really turning evil?

Hate me, detest me.

Some Oil For You

O.K so I am finally back.

The nights when I was alone had been torturing. The times when people fucked me upside for being such a wuss. You guys were right.

And I'm proud to declare: I've given up on the sticks. Once again.
It is a poor excuse, to rely on such temporary pleasures just to feel at ease.

At the end of the day, peace is found within ones own judgement and mindset.
My mind is set and I shall wait for the day.

Good luck and study hard.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Full water bottle

I think I need to rethink everything. Someone really has to put a stop to this.

Been so long

its good to see you again (:

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Thursday, April 22, 2010

when your mom asks you to finish up your food, better finish it up or the food will turn bad and the next thing you know, your dad will nag at you.

So I was thinking, my service ends in a few months time.
Not only me, Ernest and I will be ending our 2 years of national service on the month of September.


Whats next? Footman is heading off for NTU and while I tend to give excuses that I don't wish to talk about it, the truth is I have already made up my mind. Be it a straight road to stability or a dead end, I am going to finish walking it. How long will I have to walk? I have no idea. No one can predict the events that will take place in the future, fortunate or unfortunate.


Live life to the fullest, thats what they say. Its a common phrase among people.
On many occasions, I was always oblivious to the many things around me. What I've said, my actions and down to every little thing that I've done.


I should take some time off. I should do some self-reflection. I should avoid everything, for now.


My knowledge in English is minimal and I do not wish to embarrass myself any further.


Once again, this space shall be neglected for some time.


Sorry people. I'm sorry. But I hope, that I'll be a much pleasant friend to all of you, when I'm back.


Till then, see you when I see you.


Goodbye, World.

Say Anything




Only my heart's pounding, stab my heart. The silent vision of love.
Forget the time, as the cry travels. Walking through wet Tokyo, feelings make my heart rush.

Run away from reality, I've been crying in a dream.
Frozen time makes me shiver.
Building up my tainted memories, until my sadness vanishes.

You say anything, the fitting word that blesses,
Say anything to my lying heart
If I can't go back to where I have been, I'll live only in dreams,
Getting wet in the endless rain.
Colour my running tears within my daydreams.
You say anything, whatever you'd like to say to me.
Say anything, you leave me out of my eyes.
You say anything, all I can hear is a voice from within my dream.
Say Anything, you can dry my every tear.

The lights have gone out on the stage, staring lonely, embraced by the days that have gone past.
Destroying everything, including our sacred love,
Until it vanishes in the sands of time.
You say anything, whatever you'd like to say to me.

Repeat *

Close your eyes and I'll kill you in the rain.
If a beautiful murder is fitting, the artificial rose is buried,
Shedding in the memory of a poet.

Time to change my life, but my heart remains the same to you,
Time to change your heart, my love for you never changes.

You say anything, the fitting word that blesses,
But say anything to the heart that can't break.
You say anything, say anything, now you've gone away, where can I go from here?

Say anything ... say anything...

I believe if time passes. ..
everything turns into beauty, if the rain stops,
 tears clean the scars of memory away ... 
everything starts wearing fresh colours ... 
every sound begins playing a heartfelt melody ..
jealousy embellishes a page of epic, 
desire is embracing a dream, 
but my mind is still in chaos and...






Pink And Green, memories not to be forgotten.

Think I'm going to vacate this space for...I don't know till when.

Bye Bye.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Gotta be patient, for once.

This is a month of disaster. And boredom. Been staying at home most of the time.
My eye sight has been failing me lately, mostly during the mornings. Thankfully, I didn't board the wrong bus earlier on.

Patience is the key pearson, patience. Whatever the outcome, be prepared but for now, be patient, for once.

Monday, April 19, 2010

pink ribbons

Dam. I dozed off while waiting for the computer scan to finish.
Its 5.45am now. Why do I have to wake up at this hour?! Now my body clock is even more screwed.
Monday blues @.@

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Ich liebe dich (:

Just got home from 313@somerset. Was supposed to meet the dudes for awhile. I figured they might be going some place else but in the end, they decided to chill there. And so, I went home.

Oh yeah and I meet Su Ying, Davin, Kesh and Shinn @ the basement when I got there. They were talking about how to settle my outfit for Streetfest when just nice, I passed by. Talk about coincidence.

Anyways, I saw a few clothes that were pretty nice there. Think I'm gonna go shop for new stuffs next month. Its time I do a wardrobe change.

Alright, morning shift tomorrow. But I guess I won't be sleeping that early.
Goodnight everyone!

Friday, April 16, 2010

would history happen again?

Just got back from work. Was forced to stay inside the locker room as the rain was too heavy.


Had a very weird dream during my shortnap. My precious love mug was broken and my white shirt was so stained that I decided to just leave it as it is and wore them throughout a buffet session.
It felt so real. Because when I'm sleeping and dreaming, I don't have any troubles from the reality. I know it sounds stupid. Like I'm trying to avoid my problems.


Well its time to eat my medication, get my sleep and try not to think so much. Adios~

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The conveyor belt finally killed me

Its going to rain soon.

I mused and I laughed many times within the short span of time. Its time!

Love, Me by Colin Raye

i read a note my grandma wrote
back in 1923
grandpa kept it in his coat
and he showed it once to me

he said boy you might not understand
but a long long time ago
grandmas daddy didn't like me none
but i loved your grandma so

we had this crazy plan to meet and run away together
get married in the first town we came to and live forever
but nailed to the tree where we were suppose to meet instead
i found this letter and this is what it said:

if you get there before i do
don't give up on me
i'll meet you when my chores are through
i don't know how long i'll be
but i'm not gonna let you down
darling wait and see
and between now and then
until i see you again
i'll be lovin' you
love, me

i read those words just hours before my grandma passed away
in the doorway of the church where me and gandpa stopped to pray
i know i've never seen him cry
in all me fifteen years
but as he read these words to her
his eyes filled up with tears

if you get there before i do
don't give up on me
i'll meet you when my chores are through
i don't know how long i'll be
but i'm not gonna let you down
darling wait and see
and between now and then
until i see you again
i'll be lovin' you
love, me

and between now and then
until i see you again
i'll be lovin' you
love, me.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

too much rain, today.



Blesses and wishes to you. Believe in yourself, that you can do it. You have come this far, you have chosen this path. You must pull through this stage. You can do it!
have faith! Get well soon! <3

why did I even bother.

My heart beats faster whenever I see you online.

I hate to say this but my body is failing me now. oh shitz.

Pictures of me, Pictures of you

It takes months to find a customer,
seconds to lose one.

It takes a long time to find someone that you will be willing to give your all,
a few moments of foolishness to weaken that bond.

It is easy to be good. But it is even easier to be tainted.

Monday, April 12, 2010

The cards, the messages, the love

We're stronger than this.

O.K went out with the guys for prata and some discussion. Prata was..dam filling. Talked and talked after that in which I later went off for 5 minutes to have my quiet time. Went back and sat and talked for awhile more.

2 Plain pratas and 1 teh peng = 4.30
RIP OFF. Went to shanyou's rooftop later on and chill awhile.
Cocked about the condom idea and watched a video on fz's iphone about this monkey peeing into his own mouth and a woman peeing while lifting weights.
Great laughs. Took a bus home with Mao and Xh after that. And now I'm back.

Daily, I think of you. I'm missing you.

I talked to sky

Man, the night was long.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Just press the off button, pls

How have you been? How are you feeling today? Are you ok? Did you get a good sleep?
Remember to eat on time and drink more water. Study hard but don't neglect your health. Rest if you can. Time is tight for you, you're rushing for many things. Please take good care of yourself when I'm not around. Please, be strong.

belated

this came late but..happy 5th month... sniff

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Voiceless Screaming

I'm drowning in sadness
Falling far behind
I feel there is just no way out
Is there anyone there? Where am I?

Insanity and loneliness
Tear my painful heart
Broken heart keeps on going to beat
But it never stops bleeding

I've been waiting for love to come
Someone who wants to touch me inside
Memories of my yesterdays

Careless words and deeds
Masquerade of love
Gotta find my way outta here

I was blinded by dark desire
Over time I've been through it all
I'm crying my share of tears

What can I do
Will I make it through
I must be true to myself

Voiceless Screaming
Calling to me inside of my heart
Voiceless Screaming
Now is the time I got to speak out

Voice of faith, I'm starting to realize
Now my eyes can see
I have gone so far
I'm feeling breath of life

And I'm looking for love to reach
Someone I want to touch deep inside
Light shines on my sight of doubt
Don't be afraid
Move forward one step
Willing mind is what I have found at last

Voiceless Screaming
Calling to me inside of my heart
Voiceless Screaming
Now is the time I got to speak out

Voiceless Screaming
Calling to me inside of my heart
Knockin' on my soul's door
I believe in myself and trust what I do

Voiceless Screaming
Pain of the past still hurts me inside
Knockin' on my soul's door
I climb the stairs that lead me to Heaven








Gotta love X Japan.


we have to pull through! *hugs*

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

its dam long!

waiting for the program to finish patching. its taking its own sweeeeet time.

i miss my love ):

Monday, March 29, 2010

Had a short session of jamming today.
Did a miserable recording with kesh's SE phone after su yings iphone failed terribly.


Renaissance - Alice Nine's White prayer Cover

NERF match today! Dam, was it fun.
BB, keep going! hang in there! (:

shift work is seriously boring me.

Friday, March 26, 2010

just a lil too much

O.K, I overslept a little today. And I woke up feeling shitty with my dad tapping my head    asking me to write an email for him.

Yesterday was fruitless.

B is having english oral today. Gd luck!

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

SHOULD I JUST LAUGH @ YOUR LIFE INSTEAD?

Its a difficult question in mind.
There comes a time when a man has to make a life choice.
Actually I think it happens from time to time, not just once.

A Man Chooses. A Slave, Obeys.

Catchy phrase from Bioshock. I like that. Make your own decisions, make it a smart one, don't regret. But if it WAS stupid, let it be a learning experience that it shall not happen again.

There are dark clouds looming out in the skies right now...perfect weather for my nap.
My body clock is so screwed so if anyone out there wants to challenge me into a "my work is so tiring, i'm so tired pls i didn't get enough sleep", be my guest. It is best to leave me be and not advise me to go sleep early or anything related to that because it only irritates me.



B! Keep on going! Don't give up! :DD <3

Sunday, March 21, 2010

its ticklish

I can only say I miss you and wait (: pull through this love!
<3

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Its ok with you but not for me.

gf is out. Its school holidays for students but not for us. 
IPPT is done and finished. Where got time. ORD liao.

where is my love.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

The Cows Drink Milk


Happy thoughts for now.
Looking forward to seeing you again.
wahoo!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Thursday, March 11, 2010

golden balls never live to tell the story

I saw flashes of lights, blaring sirens. A lady approached me from the left and asked if I was alright. Then came this guy who shook me violently before slapping me and asking if I was alright, again.

Next, a boy ran to me and delivered a kick to my shin and asked, "you ok?"

I answered none of them. Instead, I ignored them and crossed the road, oblivious to the traffic and almost got knocked down by a truck. Then I saw a chicken by the bridge, I went pass it and heard it mumbling, "think I'll cross the bridge..."
Why did the chicken not cross the road but used the bridge?


Dreams are weird shits man.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Time may change my life

and it withers slowly in the wind.

fantasy of dreams.
a dreamers dream.

The only burden in me, the life I've ruined with my own foolishness.
I only ask for forgiveness.

Sigh.

on the other side...
Baby, get well soon. (:
MAYDAY.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Often I wake up to a good morning and I discover something interesting to brighten my mood for the day. Not this time. But still, I have to keep telling myself to be calm and resolved no matter the situations.

Inappropriateness. Well, thanks.
Looking forward to the week (:

Its time to commit time for myself. Everything else is secondary.

protecting the only precious mug

Everything is warped. Till appreciation & understanding comes in, I think I'll just stfu.

Monday, March 1, 2010

Making another cup of milo

I have endless cups of milo (that is till the tin runs dry) to fill my stomach before i leave for work.

Once again, it is a sleepless night.
Think I'll text baby when she wakes up. ah hehe.

OK. Back to drum practice.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

too many shilings

O.K so its back to hard work and sweat.

Friday, February 26, 2010

last warning

gonna give it another shot. if its still the same, I'll just stop bothering.

Gonna start neglecting this space.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

its never ending.

on a brighter note, I've decided to ****************************************
also, tomorrow I'm going to *****************************************************
but what if ***************************************************

well?

perhaps i'll just ****************************************************

Optimism. It is needed to solve solutions.
Goals + Optimism = Success

Goals in the absence of Optimism is bullshit. Might as well don't achieve anything at all.
Its just like Darkness is the absence of light.

oh wtf am i talking about. stfu stfu. sheesh.


And to my dearl lil gf yuanying, cheer up! You've been overloading yourself lately. I know your problem and I'll be there with you. Stop giving me the sadface! Its contagious!
you have to SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.SMILE.

(:

i don't mind making a fool out of myself. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

when it points in another direction

I thought we agreed that we'll share our problems through thick or thin?

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

I added foam cushions to my desk.

Days had been mundane. The other day, I saw a shooting star in the wee hours of the morning. No kidding but that was the first time I ever saw a shooting star.

Been staring out at the balcony for a few days...
Enjoying the peace while it lasts.

Monday, February 22, 2010

look, theres still some rice on the corners of your mouth.

Tweaking our life sounds good.

Talking about it sounds good.

Putting it into action is even better.

But wait, what are the consequences?

Saturday, February 20, 2010

the minute the paper ball touched down...

Had one hell of a jamming session earlier on.

Its a song, about balls.

Shall post it up @ a later time.

So people, its time for deep thoughts. Once again.
We humans question too much. You have so much opportunities, over one opportunity. That is, life. We're all alive. As long as we are, we'll have plenty of things to do, plenty of things to accomplish till our mortal bodies give way to ageing.

Impermanence, nothing lasts forever. Till our time is up, let us accomplish our dreams & goals to the best we can.

After all, we are just humans. Let us do only the things that are within our capacity.

Music, Play on.


Thursday, February 18, 2010

i hit my ear by acccident

and when you put in the effort, they just can't seem to be bothered. fuck you.
i wash my hands off everything.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

A clear example

Look @ this, its taken off from lassegs's profile on youtube.

I'm a poor animator, money wise.

It's very black and white when it comes to most things with me. Either very good, or very bad.

Even if I want to or not, I'm constantly trying to figure out why things are. I'd like to know what the hell we're doing here. I want to know why the world exists. Why? Because I have a human brain! So do you! Use it!

The world is actually a wonderful place, and we should feel extremely honored that it's been given to us. No, I'm not talking about God, or Allah or Vishnu or Santa Claus here, but the mere fact that we are here, and the chances of that are just impossible to explain. What is easy to explain though, is why it sucks. The world itself is superb! We're not..

We have the power to mold the world exactly how we'd like it to be, and sadly, instead of building playgrounds, we're making battlefields. We're doing so many things that makes life completely unnecessarily hard to live through, above all the perverse exploitation of power, as in religion and consumerism; two things that have done nearly nothing, other than deceiving people into living unfulfilled lives. All in all, these, and most other cruel aspects about life, can be narrowed down to one thing, which is greed, and not just the good old natural greed necessary for survival, no, I'm talking about human greed.

Listen, it's very simple:

In order to be good, you have to be so to another being. In other words, not greedy.

A four year old kid can tell you that, so why the fuck is it so hard for adults to understand that?!!

Then again, sometimes, I just think the meaning of life is not to think about the meaning of life.

And now..

TO ALL ADVERTISEMENT COMPANIES:

Before contacting me about using my work in advertisement or wanting me to work for you, please read this first:

A long time ago I promised myself never to do commercials. That's because I don't think it's right to push, usually unnecessary, products on fellow human beings. I'm not very fond of advertisement because I think it's fucking annoying, and in my eyes a cruel and irresponsible way of marketing. If you marketing people haven't thought through what you're doing before, I'll try to make it clear:

Advertisement is basically doing two things:

1) It keeps the fat monster called consumerism alive. A man made invisible entity that's slowly eating the souls of human beings, making them greedy, unfair, ignorant and dumb, that in the longer run leads to poverty and hate, that again leads to suffering, violence, death and war. It also leads to excessive exploitation of the natural resources, WHICH BY THE WAY WE ALL HAVE THE RIGHT TO OWN, that again leads to unnecessary pollution, all of which will eventually have one outcome: The fall of mankind.

2) Making some people unnecessarily rich.

So, if you have just a tiny little portion of dignity in your heart, stop making this world even shittier than it already is, and do something useful and helpful instead! If your unable to do so, please, for loves sake; KILL YOURSELF!

In addition to this, I do consider myself an artist, with a conscience and a soul! I will not use my (so called) talents to promote consumerism goddammit!! I'd rather suck dick for money, knowing that I wasn't responsible for any of the things I've described above..

So if you ask me to do a commercial, you're offending me, and if you steal my ideas, like some advertisement companies have already done, I sincerely hope that you'll get some kind of horrible decease so that you'll slowly die in front of your crying families, shitting and pissing yourself as you're being sent into the next dimension, while everything is being filmed and put here on youtube, so that we all can celebrate that there's one less waste of human flesh in this world.

Ahem, ok, sorry kids, I am one of Bill Hicks goat-children. 'More father, moooore..' 


And in case you don't know who lasseg is, heres one of his works: